There is a process that every male must go through in life. Many boys never become men either because they allow people to control their lives or because they have never submitted to Christ and allowed him to mold them into the man He is preparing them to be. Men, you have to understand that you must go to God before a woman so He can process you. Ladies, you must understand that you cannot force a man to love you who isn’t ready, you will never be good enough.
1. Boys don’t know what they want.
Every boy has a desire to chase after something. However while immature, he will simply go after what looks and feels good not necessarily what is good for them. Which is why just like a parent, God has to teach him what to avoid and what is acceptable. Men, don’t rush this period. Allow God to develop you. Premature dating will lead to broken hearts or offering women what you can’t deliver.
2. Boys are emotionally driven, men are more focused.
Whenever a little boy doesn’t get His way, he’s either ready to fight, whine or shut down internally. That’s not the man God wants His daughters with. God has to work on him so he knows how to operate under pressure and how to lead a family without emotions clouding his judgment. Ladies, don’t spend time on a boy that has you being his second mother. If he can’t be calm and collected, he isn’t fit to lead you. Remember, love is patient and kind. An emotion driven man is the one who tends to abuse women when he can’t verbally express his thoughts or handle his emotions.
3. Men work for what they want, boys want handouts.
I don’t know how you feel about it, but seeing women in control and babying their man is a disgrace. Don’t get me wrong, ladies take care of your man, but no woman should be supporting a lazy man. Ladies shouldn’t have to be raising their husbands, she isn’t his mother. A real man may not have all the degrees in the world, but he knows how to provide, protect and pray for his family. Men, make sure you’re stable with God. A degree doesn’t sustain a relationship, but a connection to Christ will.
4. Good men are hard to find.
No woman should be pursuing a man. So if you think you found a good one, you did not. A real man understands it’s his role to lead in the pursuit. He doesn’t wait on a woman to come to him out of loneliness but he finds a woman with a heart for Christ and ambition that he can grow with.
5. Godly men are under attack.
If you’re paying attention, you can see that there are more women in church than men. And the men you do see in church are either being pressured into fornication, homosexuality, marriage before they’re ready, drugs, alcohol etc. Some of these influences come from within the church as well. You will never understand the struggles a man faces, they need prayer. Don’t say “there are no good men”, and not pray that God rises up men like David, Paul, Samuel, etc. Your prayer can be the breaking point of God saving someone’s husband, child, father. Men are falling, so many are comfortable in secret sins and honestly feel trapped. Prayer and accountability will bring them out.
There’s a process men must go through, pray that they submit to Jesus before trying to lead a woman or any type of ministry. Grace and peace.
– Tovares Grey