Men Know EXACTLY What They Want!

Men know exactly what they want!… Pretty bold statement and unfortunately, most readers are probably already disagreeing with me. The fact of the matter is, a real man may be unsure of some things, but they are never indecisive. Here is proof that a real man knows exactly what they want.
1. Jesus, the perfect man for us males to emulate, was purpose driven. 
Since the day Jesus came on Earth, he had a mission in mind – to redeem us… To win back HIS BRIDE! Jesus received more opposition in a day than most of us will see in a lifetime. Jesus only had a few people in his inner circle, but his love was stretched out to all. True love is when you don’t quit when friends betray you and the ones you are trying to help turn away from you. Jesus showed us that the agony of the cross was worth enduring to get what he loved, us.
2. A real man doesn’t need several women to be satisfied. 
A real man finds his contentment in Christ so he will never seek several women to complete him. He doesn’t flirt around and he doesn’t entertain every random girl who throw themselves at him. He is chasing God, not skirts. He knows loving one woman is enough and he chooses a woman that helps him spiritually.
3. A real man makes his intentions clear. 
If you have to guess what his plans with you are, there are no plans. A man who wants to date you for years before marrying you isn’t interested in you he’s just afraid of being single and just wants someone there all the time. Does a godly man rush marriage? No, but he isn’t going to need 10 years to know if you’re for him because he spends his time with God. God would have let him know way ahead of time if he should pursue you. Ladies, a WCW post and occasional dates doesn’t mean he’s in love. Never allow yourself to give covenant benefits to a convenient person. Men don’t take advantage of women, he respects God too much to mistreat his daughter.
4. A real man doesn’t give mixed signals. His life produces fruit.
Wise men are careful of what they entertain. They don’t want to preach Christ and live a life of sin.He wouldn’t seek a virtuous woman while following immodest women on social media. He wouldn’t lead a woman on if he didn’t want her in the future. He struggles, but he doesn’t allow mistakes to define him. He allows God to mold him daily.
5. Real men work and wait for what they love.
Let’s be honest, we’ve seen guys wait in line for Jordan’s, video games, and other unimportant things like new iPhones. We all know men are patient for what interests them. Jacob waited 7 years for the woman he loved and then was tricked with her sister, and continued another 7 years for her. He wasn’t foolish. He was man enough to seek what he wanted. Don’t think today you have to rush anything, good things take time.
If you’re a man, strive to do these things more. Ultimately, you want to live more like Jesus. Seek him before you seek a woman. If you’re a woman reading this, don’t settle for less. No man is perfect, but don’t feel you have to compromise and lower standards to entertain childish boys when God is preparing a real man for you. Grace and peace.


The Man God is Preparing for Her

There is a process that every male must go through in life. Many boys never become men either because they allow people to control their lives or because they have never submitted to Christ and allowed him to mold them into the man He is preparing them to be. Men, you have to understand that you must go to God before a woman so He can process you. Ladies, you must understand that you cannot force a man to love you who isn’t ready, you will never be good enough.
1. Boys don’t know what they want.
Every boy has a desire to chase after something. However while immature, he will simply go after what looks and feels good not necessarily what is good for them. Which is why just like a parent, God has to teach him what to avoid and what is acceptable. Men, don’t rush this period. Allow God to develop you. Premature dating will lead to broken hearts or offering women what you can’t deliver.
2. Boys are emotionally driven, men are more focused.
Whenever a little boy doesn’t get His way, he’s either ready to fight, whine or shut down internally. That’s not the man God wants His daughters with. God has to work on him so he knows how to operate under pressure and how to lead a family without emotions clouding his judgment. Ladies, don’t spend time on a boy that has you being his second mother. If he can’t be calm and collected, he isn’t fit to lead you. Remember, love is patient and kind. An emotion driven man is the one who tends to abuse women when he can’t verbally express his thoughts or handle his emotions.
3. Men work for what they want, boys want handouts.
I don’t know how you feel about it, but seeing women in control and babying their man is a disgrace. Don’t get me wrong, ladies take care of your man, but no woman should be supporting a lazy man. Ladies shouldn’t have to be raising their husbands, she isn’t his mother. A real man may not have all the degrees in the world, but he knows how to provide, protect and pray for his family. Men, make sure you’re stable with God. A degree doesn’t sustain a relationship, but a connection to Christ will.
4. Good men are hard to find.
No woman should be pursuing a man. So if you think you found a good one, you did not. A real man understands it’s his role to lead in the pursuit. He doesn’t wait on a woman to come to him out of loneliness but he finds a woman with a heart for Christ and ambition that he can grow with.
5. Godly men are under attack.
If you’re paying attention, you can see that there are more women in church than men. And the men you do see in church are either being pressured into fornication, homosexuality, marriage before they’re ready, drugs, alcohol etc. Some of these influences come from within the church as well. You will never understand the struggles a man faces, they need prayer. Don’t say “there are no good men”, and not pray that God rises up men like David, Paul, Samuel, etc. Your prayer can be the breaking point of God saving someone’s husband, child, father. Men are falling, so many are comfortable in secret sins and honestly feel trapped. Prayer and accountability will bring them out.
There’s a process men must go through, pray that they submit to Jesus before trying to lead a woman or any type of ministry. Grace and peace.
– Tovares Grey

Five Things to Know about Grace

What is grace? It amazes me that the very thing God uses to save us is often the most misunderstood topic in the bible. I myself sometimes have a hard time understanding grace, but then I remember God is not a man and He does not think like us. Here are 5 things you must know about grace.
1. God’s grace saved us.
None of us are worthy of His love. The one thing God hates is in our very nature to do, sin. You must understand that when Jesus went to the cross that He knew every sin we would commit and still felt compassion and died in our place. Why? LOVE! God doesn’t love us because we are good, He loves us because He is good. In return His love will draw us to do good by obeying Him.
For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Ephesians 2:8 
2. Grace overcomes sin, it does not condone it.
Well you may say that’s contradicting, and that God still loves us when we sin. However, grace never gave a license for sin, grace is a power to overcome the struggle. Other than Jesus, Paul was one of the greatest men to walk this earth. He had a struggle as well, God told Him He was not going to remove the struggle because it forces Paul to be humble and depend on God.
And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 2 Corinthians 12:9
3. Grace rewards.
God is no respecter of person, but there is a principle to everything He does. He is our Father, see him as you would see your earthly Father. Obedience causes you to walk in God’s will and He then gives you the desires of your heart, but rebelling may cause Him to allow you to go out on your own and see for yourself that you need Him (the prodigal son for example).
For the Lord God is a sun and shield: the Lord will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly. Psalms 84:11
4. You are where you are because of grace. 
God doesn’t hate the less fortunate, let’s set the record straight. Truth be told, we would be in someone else’s shoes if God didn’t have His hand on our life. You may not be perfect, but God is perfecting you into His image.
But by the grace of God I am what I am: and his grace which was bestowed upon me was not in vain; but I laboured more abundantly than they all: yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me. 1 Corinthians 15:10
5. Grace is for everyone. 
There are no favorites. God came for all of us and He is willing to save all of us who seek Him diligently.
For the grace of God that bringeth salvation hath appeared to all men, Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world; Looking for that blessed hope, and the glorious appearing of the great God and our Saviour Jesus Christ; Titus 2:11-13


Everyone worships something or someone. Many of us, and I’m speaking of believers, love God but He isn’t the one who we worship. We are seeking more followers on social media, education, a better relationship and “real love”, and many of us are chasing money. I’m not saying having any of these are sins, but when they cloud our mind from more of Jesus, then we have an issue.
But none of these things move me, neither count I my life dear unto myself, so that I might finish my course with joy, and the ministry, which I have received of the Lord Jesus, to testify the gospel of the grace of God. (‭Acts‬ ‭20‬:‭24‬)
At the end of the day, Jesus is the only thing that matters. None of our achievements are of significance if He isn’t pleased with our life.
If you are the only one, keep seeking Jesus. The three Hebrew boys were isolated, but they didn’t compromise. You don’t have to be like others, but you have to try to live like Jesus. You have to pursue God, even after you have found Him. You can’t be comfortable where you are spiritually because that’s when the devil and distractions creep in. Seek more of God, stay desperate for His presence.


Wake Up

Just five more minutes….. It’s still early, I have more time to rest….. That’s what we usually tell ourselves every morning before we start our day (Lord help us if it’s a Monday). It’s easy to become so tired or so nonchalant and uninterested in doing certain things when they seem repetitive or unnecessary. It’s okay to be tired, but why is this happening in the Church?
And that, knowing the time, that now it is high time to awake out of sleep: for now is our salvation nearer than when we believed. -Romans 13:11
You see whether we choose to admit it or not, most of us are either sleeping, or hitting the snooze button spiritually. God requires much more from us, but we try to give the bare minimum, as though there is some check-off list to salvation. Why would God save us in order for us to keep quiet and not share His Word with others? Why is it that the preacher is boring and the music is entertaining? It seems as though the things of God no longer interest us unless they benefit us. Many of us shout at the thought of being blessed, but we close our ears and shout “YOU’RE NOT FROM GOD” if we are ever told to die to sin and carry our cross.
God wants more. God deserves more. Are you ready to surrender? It’s no point in us playing church, God isn’t impressed. We can be born and raised in church and go to Hell. No, I will not say “a Christ-less eternity” to make it sound cute. We can end up in HELL where the fire and torture doesn’t end. Why give that up for this world that only takes from you and could never make you happy the way Jesus can?
They confess that they know God; but in works they deny him, being abominable, and disobedient, and unto every good work reprobate. Titus 1:16
None of us are perfect and God knows we struggle. Some of us may never reach a point of perfection, but God is looking for progression. Wake up and keep pressing. Grace and peace.

Let it Go

The battle is won in the mind. We as Christians must know that living for Jesus is more than a Sunday thing, but a continual dependence on Jesus. We sometimes allow our minds to be deceived thinking that sin is too good to let go of. If we knew how filthy our sins are and how great God’s love for us really is, we wouldn’t turn back to it. I pray that we will stop living lukewarm and double-minded lives. God wants us to evict the sins out of our life that is being a hindrance in our walk with Him. Ever wonder why there isn’t much growth or miracles in church? Maybe it’s because the fear for God is long gone and we use grace as an excuse to not change. Jesus didn’t save you in order to make you better, He saved you to make you over. Don’t try to put God into your schedule, fit your schedule around God. 
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, (Hebrews 12:1 ESV)
Don’t let your mistake become your lifestyle. You may have failed, sinned, backslid and even gotten weary along the way, but grace can lift you up. Just know that no matter how much God loves you and cares, He is still a gentleman. He will not force His love on you. You can’t reject Him any longer to accept things of this world, you have to make the decision to accept His grace and live in His presence. I don’t mean go to church and find some cool Christian hobbies. I mean forsake this world in order to gain Christ. Think about it, that sin you enjoy, if it was so awesome why did you feel disgusted with yourself after? It’s because God’s spirit inside of you is convicting you and reminding you that He is better. I’ve done so much that felt good and when I finished had me like…. Ummm, was that really me?
The truth of the matter is, even though we are human, we choose to sin. We often fail to realize how harmful it is though until we are finished. We have to start living more careful because the devil tries to catch us with the subtle sins and worldly things, that before we know it, we are being entertained by ungodly things. Just as though we have to choose to sin in our mind first, we can choose to live in obedience to God. The Bible says let the mind of Christ be in you (Philippians 2:5). How do we do this? By renewing our mind (Ephesians 4:23). We have to renew our mind with God’s Word, prayer and fasting. Let’s be honest, social networks, technology, and other things we get hooked to isn’t harmful, but it isn’t spiritually beneficial. We should spend less time with things that doesn’t necessarily cause sin, but pull our hearts and attention from Jesus. We can’t check His Text (Bible) if we are so busy checking our text messages all the time.
The devil isn’t afraid of tongues, church music, or someone praising God. What scares him is when a believer understands who he/she is and walks in authority. Jesus rebuked the devil with the Word, “it is written….” We only overcome the devils temptations when we submerge our hearts and minds in His Word and in prayer. God’s Word is our light in a dark world (Psalms 119:105), the Word cleanses us (Psalms 119:9) and if hidden in our hearts it will also help us to live according to His Word (Psalms 119:11). What a tragedy that the only thing that really helps us is what we stay away from. 
By no means am I saying I’ve reached the level I’m saying we should strive for, I’m in pursuit of more of His glory just like you. I just want to remind you that none of us will get more of Christ without letting go of more of the world. John said, Christ must increase but he would have to decrease (John 3:30). Let that be your goal for this year and the rest of your life. More of Jesus and less of us. 
Grace and peace,
Tovares Grey


Dead Christians

We buy more books, join more ministries, and we follow cool Christians on social networks. We find everything to occupy our time with, other than the will of God. Many seek to go higher but they have yet to decide to leave behind the world. Some even spend hours in Church, but when it comes to personal sacrifice and devotion to God, they aren’t up for that. I realize now is because the most Christians in the Church are still alive. Now many may read that statement and either overlook it, or call me a false teacher, but before you call it hogwash, think about it. Has God ever once encouraged us to live in our flesh or has He commanded us to die to it? We often seek revival but live in rebellion. God won’t work miracles until we fear Him again.


Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. (Colossians 3:5 ESV)

….I die daily. (I Corinthians 15:31)

For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit. For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be. So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God. Romans 8:5-8

Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy. (1 Peter 1:16)

Five ways to know you’re still alive to your flesh:

1. You lack interest in Godly things.

You can tell where a person’s heart is based on what they are passionate about. It’s a problem if I can tweet about God all day but cannot spend time with Him alone off of a social network. something is wrong if I only remember God exists is Sunday during service, but I ignore Him throughout my week. It’s a problem if I can pursue a woman, but cannot pursue His presence. something is not adding up if I can shout after my favorite team scores or wins, but I am quiet in church or I cannot at least say “thank you” for many blessings”.

2. You are your own boss.

There is no such thing as “I do what I want, when I want, or how I want.” A Christian says “God, your will, on your timing, and for your glory.” We cannot think we call the shots, God is our Lord. Serving Him gives more freedom then being a slave to sin or selfish pursuits. The Bible also shows that Jesus didn’t argue or fight when accused, it says we are to hold our peace and let God fight for us (Exodus 14:14). Quit trying to be right all of the time, and leave things in the hand of God.

3. Your priorities are out-of-order:

If we rather hang out with friends or watch television than spend time with Jesus, we have to change something. If we rather check our texts instead of His Text (The Bible), something is out-of-order. If I can watch a movie for hours or a game for hours and I think God better be happy with my two-minute prayers throughout the day, then I need to repent.

4. If I’m not in obedience to the Word.

“No one is perfect” is an ungodly excuse from the pit of Hell that seeks to ensnare us believers into complacency. The devil wants us to give God less than what He deserves and say, “Thank God for grace”. Don’t be fooled, grace saves but it also changes. The Word of God is our mirror that we need to look into and have God clean us up and chisel us into His image. We cannot treat God’s Word like a magazine, skimming to what we like and what is convenient. All of it is to be obeyed, applied, and taken to heart.

5. My friends aren’t seeking God.

Don’t get me wrong, we will all hang around unbelievers, and we will be related to them, but if the relationships you are closest to you are pointing you towards sin, something is wrong. Don’t seek to be like the world, stand out and be the light (Romans 12:2). Your friends can determine your outcome, choose wisely (Proverbs 13:20).

A generation is rising that wants the power of God without being in submission to God. Before honor is humility. Remember this, the God of the Old Testament is the same God in the New Testament. The bible tells us that Jesus is still the same (Hebrews 13:8), so why do we think He’s comfortable with sin now? Yes, He has always been merciful, but that never made Him happy that we are comfortable in sin. He said, if you love me you will keep my commandments (John 14:15). God wants our obedience, not our excuses. You may not be perfect, but God wants you to die daily to your carnal nature so your spirit can become conformed to His image (Romans 8:29). Maybe you will never be perfect, maybe you won’t reach maturity for years, but will you at least try to please God with your life and not just your mouth? I don’t want to simply say I’m a Christian or believer, but I want to live the way the apostles did in the Bible. My God is still the same, I have more resources than they did, I am probably younger than they were, and I cannot make it simply seem as though God is retired and the world will never experience true Christianity. I have personally seen miracles with my own eyes and ears: cancer healed in many at my church, financial breakthroughs, lawsuits and jail time canceled, and more but I don’t want to sound like I’m boasting. My point is this, I want it to happen more in my life and I would love for it to happen in yours as well, so I draw this question to you: Are you willing to die so that Christ can finally take complete control over your life?

“If Jesus isn’t Lord of all, He isn’t Lord at all.”

I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20)

– Tovares Grey


The Chase

This one is for the guys. I’m well aware that many guys are seeking relationships: some boys just want to have “fun”, but there are some men that are looking for commitment, so I had to write something about it to put some things into perspective concerning relationships.

When seeking a relationship, keep these things in mind:

1. God did not create you to be a player or a pimp.

Do not waste the young lady’s time or emotions with your games. If you want to commit, then do so. If you don’t, move on. It is not fair for any person to invest so much into you and a future they are expecting only to have you treat them as though they never mattered. A real man doesn’t make 100 different women fall in love with him, he commits to one and tries to find hundreds of ways to make her happy. God cannot be pleased with you treating his daughters like toys.

2. Seek her heart, not her body.

Guys, God wants you to pursue a virtuous woman, not chase skirts. Jacob is the perfect example for a man so in love that he was willing to wait seven years for her (Genesis 29:20).It felt like a few days because of how much he loved her. Even after being cheated by her father, he went through another seven-year period of waiting for the woman he desired. Until you two commit to one another at the altar, don’t combine your souls in bed. It just isn’t worth the emotional roller coaster to have your body connected to many different people.

3. Is she even virtuous?

Stop looking at curves, and look for a woman with a heart after God. It does not matter how nice they look, if their heart is not after Jesus than how can they build you up spiritually? Many women call themselves “Proverbs 31” women and many aim to be there, but did you know that not many live that lifestyle? Proverbs 31 does not mention a woman’s looks, it focuses on her heart and character. Be careful of getting a beautiful woman who is lukewarm, more concerned about her fashion and social networks instead of evangelizing to lost souls, or a woman who is lustful instead of spiritual. The person you marry will be raising your kids, are you sure you want your kids acting like them? It does not matter if she can twerk, turn you on or she attends church occasionally. The question to ask is does she love Jesus, is she a role model and can she wait until marriage so you two can remain pure in heart and body?

4. Singleness is not a disease.

It is okay to spend time being single so you can get your life into perspective. Your life does not begin on your wedding day, so live now! Quit waiting on someone to complete you because true satisfaction does not come from man, it comes from Jesus. Colossians 2:10 says, “And ye are complete in him (Jesus), which is the head of all principality and power:. We are complete in Jesus, don’t look for anyone to fill the void in your heart that can only be filled by Jesus. This season of singleness is what helps you become a better spouse. Get your life together now before burdening your spouse with unnecessary baggage later.


 Come on, do I even have to say this? Guys, God created you as a leader and provider, quit being comfortable having the woman do everything. It is okay if she makes more money than you, but the problem is when you are lazy or have no ambition, feeling comfortable that you don’t have anything to do. Study, work, learn, excel! Be an example to younger guys and to this economy. Let her know that even if you guys go through a slump or if you don’t have a job at the moment, that you will still spend your time finding ways to provide and lead whether financially, spiritually, and emotionally.

There is nothing wrong with being attracted to someone. It seems as though God wired us as men to be stimulated by sight, but it can turn chaotic if we go about it the wrong way. Your sex drive is normal, but can be uncontrollable if you feed your heart and mind with sinful things. Men are initiators, hunters, and even conquerors. What thrills men is the chase to get a woman, but sometimes that in turn hurts a woman because some men lose interest after they have won her heart and eventually get bored and want to move on to someone else. God said that it wasn’t good for a man to be alone so he made a woman to help him. However, I am well aware that not everyone is meant to be married, and sometimes God simply has a different purpose for them. That is fine, when single you can give more of your heart, time and resources to your purpose. Just know that whether you are chasing a relationship or not, remember to chase Jesus. Never stop following Jesus to be with anyone, whoever you end up with should help you grow spiritually. photo

– Tovares Grey


The sole purpose of Jesus coming to earth was to take from satan what was originally designed for Him, mankind. We are all born with a sinful nature and are going to rebel against God, even if it wasn’t willfully. Since the fall of Adam, we all needed a savior. That is the reason Jesus came, to put us back in right standing with God. 
Even as the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many. (Matthew 20:28)
When Jesus came on earth, He didn’t seek popularity. In fact, His ministry didn’t really start until He was 30 (Luke 3:23). When His ministry began, He was concerned more about delivering people, rather than getting people to like Him. Jesus was more concerned about seeing lost souls find their purpose, rather than having a large fan base. There even came a point when He said some statements that caused many to leave Him (John 6:66). He didn’t break down and give up because He knew His purpose was redeeming man, not to be famous. There came times when Jesus would heal someone and would say to keep quiet (Ex: Matthew 8:1-4). There was no fear in Jesus, but He wasn’t seeking attention. Jesus called only 12 men, and because of their ministry, this world has never been the same. 
And that, knowing the time, that now it is high time to awake out of sleep: for now is our salvation nearer than when we believed. (Romans 13:11)
I believe the church has lost focus a bit. We are so concerned about ourselves and fail to realize many do not yet know Jesus. Are you more concerned about who’s following you, rather than who’s following Him? We check our social network followers daily, but how many check to see who’s following Jesus? We have the unfollower apps so we are quick to unfollow someone back, but we should be more focused on who stopped following Jesus. People are still in church but have backslidden in their hearts, maybe it’s your prayer or help that could restore them. The Church has many activities going on and making people believe God is pleased, but is He? Are souls being saved or are lukewarm Christians simply being entertained?
Be careful of what you focus on. Focus on souls, not just followers. The only thing we can bring to heaven is people, but we won’t bring a twitter or Instagram account. The main focus there is Jesus, not how many likes or retweets you got on earth. Stop inviting people to a doctrine, Church or to a party, invite them to Jesus!
Too many want titles, the microphone and popularity. Not many dedicate their lives to serving, praying, studying and fasting. The men Jesus picked changed the world because they dropped their identity to follow Jesus. They allowed themselves to be changed by Christ before they shared the Gospel. Too many of us try to follow Jesus, but aren’t willing to let go of our sins, bad company or even sinful behavior. It’s time for us to stop and think about what’s more important, social networks or a relationship with Jesus? Church members or disciples? Don’t point people to yourself, point them to Jesus.
– Tovares Grey