Stop Chasing Butterflies

I receive many questions from people who want to know how can they tell if someone is the one for them. We’ve made a YouTube video about the concept of “the one” and wrote a blog about knowing how you can tell if they’re the one for you, you should check it out if you haven’t already. However, it confuses me when someone says they’re with someone who’s amazing and loves God, treats them right, but something is missing.
“Well…. what’s missing?”
“I don’t know. I just don’t have those butterflies I’d expect to have.”

“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” (Jeremiah 17:9)

Can I tell you something that you know, but can easily forget? Your feelings will destroy you. Your feelings will have you running back to relationships that God delivered you out of. Your feelings will have you running back to abusive relationships, because you’re focused on memories instead of reality. Your feelings will have you thinking it’s okay to to let your flesh take control, but you know in your heart what God is telling you to do.
DO NOT ALLOW SOCIAL MEDIA, FRIENDS OR TELEVISION TO TELL YOU WHAT TRUE LOVE IS.
If you want to know true love, look at the Bible’s definition of it (1 Corinthians 13). Too many expect life to be like Love and Basketball or The Notebook. All of these Disney and movie fantasies will have you ignoring your blessing that you’re praying about. Many people want a godly relationship, but when they have a godly person in their lives that’ll correct them when they’re falling or lukewarm, they take it as judgement. So you want a godly relationship, but you don’t want God? Some people claim they want true love, but they really just want someone they can post on social media. Just because all of your friends are dating or married, that doesn’t mean God is telling you to do the same.
Don’t get me wrong, I love being married, but I honestly believe many of us don’t understand that marriage is way more than we think. We have to understand that marriage is a ministry as well and God has to prepare us for it. I honestly believe our motives are what causes us to have our blessings delayed (read more about that here).

“(For we walk by faith, not by sight:)” 2 Corinthians 5:7

I’ve learned that we live in a generation of people that are driven by emotions (see Provers 30:12). We disregard the word of God, and we go by opinions instead of scripture. We don’t like correction, because our feelings are placed higher than God at times.

“There is a generation that are pure in their own eyes, and yet is not washed from their filthiness.” (Proverbs‬ ‭30:12‬)

There are days when my marriage isn’t all sunshine and roses. I absolutely love my wife and our marriage is great (she said so as well, so don’t think I’m being dramatic lol). However, that does NOT mean we are happy every single waking moment of the day. There are some days when it’s like she can’t wait to hug me, and there are some times when I’m sure her hands just want to hug my neck. If we go by those days when there are no “butterflies”, we’d foolishly think God didn’t bring us together. When we don’t feel those “butterflies”, does that mean it’s time to jump ship? No. It’s time to keep cultivating our love so it doesn’t die out.
Does that mean I’m telling you to settle? NO, PLEASE DON’T SETTLE. I get butterflies when I’m around my wife still. But you have to understand feelings should not dictate your future. Pray regarding that person. If God gives you peace regarding them and He gives you confirmation to keeping the relationship, then don’t give up on them just because you don’t feel happy all the time.
Grace and peace.

Stumbled back into Lust? #NoLustNovember

Hey guys! Day 6, and I know some of you are absolutely amazing and you are just kicking your old lifestyle out and seeking Jesus like never before. However, I am realistic and I know this isn’t the case for all of us. Have you made a mistake since the month started? Have you looked at lustful images and didn’t turn away like you should have? Is that girl’s body still in your mind, bro? Is that handsome guy still playing with your mind and emotions, sis? Did that song, movie, or conversation stir lust back up into your heart? Did you go to their house again knowing it would lead to fornication?
 

Like a dog that returns to his vomit is a fool who repeats his folly. (Proverbs 26:11 ESV)

 
It’s crazy that we look at the men and women in the bible as being such perfect believers and that must have been the reason God used them, right? Wrong, God used them because they depended on His Spirit. God didn’t use them because they had it all figured out. Paul is someone I reference a lot, because he was a great example on how to live (other than Jesus). However Paul mentioned that he had a weakness he wanted God to remove. God told him “no”. He was telling Paul that His grace was sufficient for him and He would help him overcome his issues (see 2 Corinthians 12:7-10). However, I want to draw your attention to Romans 7 (read all of it when you can). Paul mentions that the things he wants to do, he doesn’t do, but yet he finds himself doing things he doesn’t plan to do (Romans 7:15). Sounds familiar? Yes, because that is all of us serving Christ. We want to live pure and righteous lives, but we don’t at times. We want to hate sin at times, but yet we find ourselves falling into sin. Not only do we fall into sin, but we fall into the same one we repented of 831 times at the altar. However, I love how chapter 8 begins, because it stops focusing on our failures and points us to the solution – Jesus and His grace. You are not condemned. You are His. Don’t stay in your mess when Jesus died to free you.
 

There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. (Romans 8:1)

 
I’m here to tell you that it is okay that you messed up. The only people who mess up are the ones who tried. You can only break a fast when you are fasting. You can only become weary when you have been fighting. Falling is inevitable, because you are human. But that is why we have the Holy Spirit, to guide us away from temptation and to restore us when we fall. Are your actions okay when you sin? Not at all. Is God pleased with your decision to turn back to your sin? No, He wasn’t pleased. But I am here to tell you that it is okay for you to get back up again. No way am I telling you to keep committing your sin, but you have to understand that God expects growth, but He is fully aware that we are human. There is grace for His children because we cannot do things on our own (Psalms 130:3). You don’t have to stay down just because you fell into the same mess. You can and you will overcome, in Jesus’ name. You won’t overcome on your own, but you will when you decide to turn away from those things and people that are toxic to your spiritual walk.
 

If thou, Lord, shouldest mark iniquities, O Lord, who shall stand? But there is forgiveness with thee, that thou mayest be feared. (Psalms 130:3-4)

 
So for those who have fallen, and for those will fall tomorrow, please get back up again. Be sorrowful, be remorseful, be sincere in your repentance and get back up again. Take a break from social media if you must. Unfollow some accounts if you’re failing. End some relationships if you see the cycle is repeating and no boundaries are being followed. Because it is one thing for your relationship to make a mistake, but it is another when it is just not God’s will for your life (read more about that here). Please don’t quit, let’s keep growing!
Remember to stay engaged with us! How?
– By using the hashtag #NoLustNovember on your pictures, statuses or videos that you’ll use to encourage others.
– Sharing what God shared with you during your devotion.
– Sharing a quick video about overcoming lust or a testimony.
 
Pray Psalms 51 when you get the chance.
 
Grace and peace.

No Lust November

Welcome to the first day of #NoLustNovember! Everyone is familiar with “No Shave November”, but I wanted to do a weird twist on it and give Christians something they can relate to. This is a challenge for everyone to jump in on. I’ll be checking for this hashtag on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter and talking to you all so we all can hold one another accountable. 
Before you go any further, I have a blog on “Fighting Lust” that you can read here if you haven’t already. 

“There is a generation that are pure in their own eyes, and yet is not washed from their filthiness.” (Proverbs‬ ‭30:12‬)


One of the most dangerous things a believer can do is assume that they have it all together. The Bible says to be careful when you think you’re standing firm because that is when you’ll fall (1 Corinthians 10:12).
Many Christians are under the impression that they cannot fall into sexual temptation. I used to be one of those. I would wonder how are people being so gullible and consistently falling into the same sin, but I realized with my own struggles that it wasn’t something as simple as I assumed. Then there are other Christians that believe they cannot break that cycle over their lives, but that’s because they aren’t properly following God and establishing boundaries. Understand this, falling into sexual sin is common. I am not saying this to justify anyone’s sinful lifestyle. I am saying that so you can know as a reader that you can overcome in Jesus’ name and you don’t have to keep hiding your weakness. God’s strength is made perfect in your weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).
Be willing to let go. 






But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. (Matthew 5:28-29)


When you talk about overcoming lust, many people target the symptoms rather than the real issue. So they’ll be willing to stop watching a certain show, but they won’t end the relationship. Or they will end the relationship, but they’ll still check up on the person. Sometimes we even overcome and then turn back to our filth. What I have realized is, Jesus isn’t a passive God. Jesus was so drastic in His teaching that many didn’t like Him and many turned away. If we aren’t willing to cut off what stimulates lust, are we tired of that lifestyle? No, we enjoy it but we don’t want its consequences. Sin never satisfies, it only pushes you to go further and further away from the presence of God. Are you disgusted with your sin yet? Ask God to remove those desires. Stop entertaining those desires and watch that sinful desire begin to fade out of your life. 
Be willing to examine your heart and take spiritual inventory. Some people shouldn’t still be in your life. Some shows shouldn’t still be on your tv. Some social media accounts should’ve been unfollowed months ago. Are you willing to let go of your past life to embrace what God has for you?




“But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.” (‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭2:9‬)


What are you going to choose today? Your porn or Jesus? Your fornicating/adulterous relationship or Jesus? Your ungodly friendships or Jesus? Your music that corrupts your heart or Jesus? Your feelings or Jesus? Your lust or Jesus? Your pride or Jesus? 





“For my people have committed two evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewed them out cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water.” (Jeremiah‬ ‭2:13‬)


This scripture shows us that we as the people of God can easily backslide and choose things that can’t satisfy. The woman who met Jesus at the well was searching for Jesus, but she didn’t know it. No man could satisfy. She went from man to man and still never found true love until she met Jesus. That’s you and I. Searching for something to satisfy, and I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to choose lust anymore. 
So what do you say…….Challenge accepted? 
This journey is for everyone, but I don’t expect everyone to participate. If you desire more of God and less of that sinful cycle, then let’s get this party started! Jesus satisfies, trust me. Let’s not turn back. Forget what you did before starting this and let’s go back to the cross and the plan of God. 
What I need you to do!
1. Post a picture everyday with the hashtag #NoLustNovember so we can be engaged together! 
2. Post a verse, prayer, or your journal talking about what God is sharing with you on this challenge. 
3. Don’t judge anyone, just grow! 
4. Don’t quit WHEN you make a mistake. Not if! 
Grace and peace. 

God's Love Breaks Spells

Witchcraft, fornication and adultery, stealing, lying, gossiping, gambling, drinking or smoking, clubbing, insecurities, and maybe even rejection. Almost everyone in the world has fell into one of these categories. Whether we have participated in the act, or were forced into the act. However, the truth remains that everyone, has committed a sin, they have also done things they are surely not proud of, and everyone is broken in some way.
for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, (Romans 3:23)
– Some use this as a scripture to justify their foolishness, I mean sin. However, this scripture is why we all need a savior, because we all have sinned.
– Sin is punishable by death, eternity in Hell. That’s why we all need Jesus!
– Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to mankind by which we must be saved.” (Acts 4:12)
Sin is a disease that spreads like leprosy.
– It starts on the inside and then slowly comes out of us. Once it reaches on the outside it spreads, and can even be contagious.
– Sin begins in our heart, not when we commit the action. If we meditate on a sin, eventually the body will do what the mind wants.
Temptation isn’t a sin. It is a sin when we yield to it.
We tend to point fingers when tempted, but the truth is, it is our own fault. The devil doesn’t give anyone evil desires. The only power he has, is the ability to tempt you. However, you won’t be lured away unless that’s your weakness.
– If you like short and black, he won’t send a man/woman that is tall and red.
– If you don’t have a stealing problem, he cannot tempt you with that.
– The devil studies us, and it is sad that he knows us better than we know ourselves. That’s because people refuse to admit their struggles.
When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. (James 1:13-15)
We all have shortcomings, but that is a blessing.
– When we come to the realization that I can only overcome a sin when God helps me, then we will have a reason to pray.
– A thorn in our flesh will keep us humble. Knowing that we will fall unless we stay in the presence of God.
– If we all felt as though we were perfect, we wouldn’t want God.
Jesus came to set us free from the bondage of sin. Jesus knew it would be so hard for everyone to follow the law, and the law also made so many people self righteous.
The problem today is that people want to be saved from Hell, but not from sin.
– However, God doesn’t work that way.
Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you, (2 Corinthians 6:17)
Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord: (Hebrews 12:14)
Do not get me wrong, Jesus is a loving and forgiving God, but he cannot tolerate sin.
– No man can hold God’s hand and then with the other hold the devils hand.
– You must choose a side.
– Jesus isn’t a fan of Lukewarm Christians, Revelation 3:16.
– Holiness is a requirement, not a suggestion.
I am a living testimony that God delivers us from everything that we want to be delivered from.
– It is true that many of us give God part of our lives and then try to control the others.
– Saying things like, “God take away the suicidal thoughts”, but we do not want to give up pornography.
– God wants our entire being, all of our heart. Not just what we feel is convenient.
Speaking for myself, I wanted God to take away everything from me, but I honestly didn’t want to give up lust. He’s worked on me in many areas but that one I didn’t want Him to touch, but handle myself. I’ve done things I’m not proud of, but I thank God I’m still a virgin and He didn’t allow me to go too far. Now the closer I get to Him is the more I see the need to give that up. That along with anything else that doesn’t please Him.
Our problem is, we think we can change ourselves. People outside of church say they are going to get their act together and then come to church. That is impossible! God changes us by His spirit and His word, we cannot do it by ourselves. Stop trying to do God’s job and let Him mold you into the person He designed you to be.
People come to me and say that they believe being a Christian is boring.
– It surely is, if you do not have a connection to God.
– It definitely looks that way when you see Christians living lukewarm lives.
– It surely doesn’t attract people when they see you in the club, cursing and half naked on social networks, and singing on the choir in church.
– It surely does look that way when people complain about what they don’t have, instead of being grateful for what God has already done.
Christians, it is time to seek God like never before and let His love transform us from the inside out.
If we really understood the love of God, we wouldn’t live the way we do. We indulge in sin, but sin is deceitful. Feels good but sucks the life out of us slowly. Trying to impress and fit in, but in the end you still have a longing that cannot be fulfilled. That’s because the things or people of this world, cannot fill the void that is meant for God!
– Love for God causes us to obey Him.
– If ye love me, keep my commandments. (John 14:15)
Jesus’ love made Him die for our sins. Don’t let His death be in vain in your life.
Give up sin, accept real life. Life in Christ!
Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. (2 Corinthians 5:17)
His love has broken every spell over my life and I’m grateful for that, will you allow Him to do the same for you?
– Tovares Grey

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Imperfect, Yet Victorious

There will always be a time in someone’s life where they will fail at something. No one will always go through their life without troubles. You may lose a game in sports, you may fail an exam, and you may even be a devoted Christian that falls into sin.
Jesus is well aware that a Christian will go through temptation, hard trials, and will have many obstacles to overcome. He was God in human form, but the bible showed that He was well aware of life’s troubles.
– Read John 17, that was Jesus’ prayer for us.
– For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. (Hebrews 4:15)
Jesus overcame the world. His spirit within us now empowers us to overcome sin, temptation, and every trial.
If you struggle with any of the upcoming situations, let me just give you a few scriptures to uplift you.
• Sickness:
– But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. (Isaiah 53:5)
– If you never been sick, how would you know that God is a healer?
• Low income:
– But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. (1 Timothy 6:6, 7, 10)
– I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread. (Psalm 37:25)
– Money isn’t everything. Don’t serve God for a big bank account.
• Fear:
– For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7)
– There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. (1 John 4:18)
– When God is on your side, there is nothing to be afraid of.
• Feeling Condemned:
– There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. (Romans 8:1)
– Jesus convicts us so we can repent, the devil condemns so we can avoid the presence of God.
• Indecisive:
– The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way. (Psalm 37:23)
– Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. (Proverbs 3:5-6)
– We will never be sure of what to do unless we are aligned with God and allow Him to lead us.
• Sexual Temptation:
– There hath no temptation taken you but such as is COMMON to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)
– Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. (Philippians 4:8)
– If you feed into it, you will fall into it. That’s like digging a grave that you’ll eventually fall into. Starve it and it’ll die. Be careful what you listen to, watch, and entertain.
• Consistently falling into Sin:
– Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. (James 4:7)
– If you never submit to God, you will NEVER have the power to resist sin.
• Unforgiveness:
– But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; (Matthew 5:44)
– Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven. (Matthew 18:21- 22)
– Of course it gets annoying forgiving the same person over and over for the same reasons but forgiveness isn’t for them, it is for you. Not forgiving and being bitter is like drinking poison and expecting the next person to die.
People in the bible also had issues, but God used them!
– Timothy was too young.
– David stole a mans wife and had him killed.
– Paul used to kill Christians.
– Peter denied Jesus.
The list goes on and on.
You have your issues that need to be fixed, but stop trying to do it by yourself. Let Jesus fix it, you cannot do anything by yourself.
– Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me. (John 15:4)
You are striving towards perfection, but you have to understand what perfection is. Biblical perfection speaks of maturity.
– This stage is where you are producing much fruit, see Galatians 5:22-23.
– This stage doesn’t mean you will have no fault. You are just less likely to sin because you rely on God more and you are very close to Him.
Stop beating yourself up. We are fighting from victory, not for victory. The battle is already won!
And ye shall be hated of all men for my name’s sake: but he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved. (Mark 13:13)
– Tovares Grey

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