How do I know God’s will for my life? Who does God want me to marry? Are they going to be attractive? Will they workout often? Are they spiritual? Is the person I’m with a blessing or a burden?
These are just a few of the random questions that plague our minds when we are single or are contemplating marriage. There is nothing wrong with taking great thought into marriage, the issue simply occurs when we allow our emotions or our friends to bring clarity rather than praying and waiting on Jesus to give us direction. You see, it’s nothing wrong with me being single, if I’m single and using my singleness to honor Jesus. Meaning I’m honoring God through my inward (thoughts and desires) and outward (actions, entertainment, dressing, etc.) purity. It’s also nothing wrong with being in a relationship if I’m using that relationship to glorify Jesus and not turning that person into an idol/besetting sin (see Hebrews 12:1).
“There are many devices in a man’s heart; nevertheless the counsel of the Lord, that shall stand.” (Proverbs‬ ‭19:21‬)
The majority of us want to be married, and I strongly believe it isn’t God’s will for anyone to be alone. By alone I do not mean “single”, I mean isolated and having a mindset that you can do everything by yourself. Desiring company, whether that simply being godly friends or a spouse that you can honor God with, is a good desire to have.
“Ye did run well; who did hinder you that ye should not obey the truth?” (Galatians‬ ‭5:7‬)
Whoever we date/marry will influence our spiritual walk. Maybe you missed that so I’ll say it again for anyone who hates that fact, WHOEVER WE DATE/MARRY WILL INFLUENCE OUR SPIRITUAL WALK. Too often there are believers that feel it’s okay to date nonbelievers. While that is not the right thing to do biblically (2 Corinthians 6:14 and Amos 3:3), it really isn’t safe. We may feel as though we are leading them to Jesus, but why couldn’t we do that outside of dating? Isn’t witnessing God’s will for us? We are to win souls for the kingdom, not date people into a relationship with Jesus.
For those wondering how good looking their spouse will be…. Of course the person you marry will be attractive to you, God knows that you will see more than their spiritual walk. However, everyone who is attractive or is interested is not supposed to be an option for you. That six pack isn’t a strong enough foundation for marriage. Those curves may look nice, but they do not raise your children or determine if someone respects you.
You want to know how to tell whether someone is “God’s will” for you? Seek God for yourself! If you don’t know truth, a lie will always deceive you.
“All men/women are the same”.. You’ve heard it before, but the reason they’ll keep ending up with those types is because we haven’t surrounded ourselves with God. Evil can’t stand in God’s presence, so the more you seek Jesus is the more you’ll see Him weed out the bad influences in your life. We can study a lie so we know how to resist it, but then the enemy will bring another lie. It’s not enough to understand your enemy, you have to understand Jesus as well so that you can be alert against every possible attack/distraction coming in.
“My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me:” (John‬ ‭10:27)
Just because we believe in Jesus does not mean we have a relationship with Him. God wants us to keep coming close to Him. We can’t be satisfied with where we are. The closer we get to Jesus is the further we are from distractions, and that’s definitely the easier way to recognize when something isn’t God’s will. If someone comes along trying to get you to do the opposite of what God is telling you, then it is no way that God wants you to be with them (see James 1:13-15).

Grace and peace.

A Love Letter from Jesus

February 13, 2016 — 17 Comments

My child, don’t let this world cause you to lose sight of me. I see you, I made you, I know the thoughts that I think towards you (Jeremiah 29:11). I want to bless you, but I need you to follow and trust me. You cannot earn my grace or my love, and you won’t lose it, but I need you to stay in my will. 
Many times you chased behind certain people that you didn’t need in your life, but I allowed you to go after them for you to see that they will never complete you. You chased that girl and she broke your heart. You chased that guy and he didn’t treat you how you deserved. I tried to warn you but you never noticed they were bad for you, but I want you to learn from those experiences. I am with you. I am with you. I will always be with you. Will you come to me? I beg of you to open your eyes and stop being amazed by the glory this world offers and see that it is all temporary! I love you and the place I am preparing is more beautiful than you could imagine. 
I see your pain. Not only do I see your pain, but I feel it (Hebrews 4:15). I understand your feelings and I know what it means to feel abandoned. I only came to this earth to redeem my people, and the people that I came for still rejected me (John 1:11). Yet your rejection will not stop my love for you. My love will continue to pursue you and change you if you allow it to. My love will bring healing, not a spouse. My love will restore you, not a person. My love will convict you, but it won’t condemn you. Stop trying to figure out why I love you and allow me to love you. 
The days are short and I am soon to return. Will you be chasing after me when I return or will I still find you pursuing worldly things? You can get that spouse and lose sight of me. You can get that job and lose sight of me. You can gain popularity and lose sight of me. However, when you pursue me first and my kingdom, I will take care of you. So come, come unto me and I will give you the rest that your soul desires. I love you.” 

– Jesus 

 

We all have those people in our lives that only come back to us when they have no one else entertaining their drama. You know, that ex that left you for someone else, but comes back when that relationship is failing? The person who you had to drop because the relationship only connected on a physical level, but they hit you up hoping you dropped Jesus?
“Hey stranger…”

Some people will only hit you up after you drop a nice selfie. They see you looking happy and they want to pop back up to see if that door is still opened. If someone can jump in and out of your life, that means you are not moving forward, neither are you closing the door to the person God removed from your life. One of the most dangerous things you can do in a relationship is give a permanent position to a temporary person.

Why give life to something that God killed? God will block the enemy from poisoning our hearts and minds from fruitless relationships, but we must decide to stop running back to the person He protected us from. Some relationships only lead to sexual sins, why respond to the messages? Some connections only lead to arguments, why keep hanging out with them? You think you are saving them? False, the bible warns us against connecting to the wrong relationships. 

Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners. (1 Corinthians 15:33)

Quit giving the enemy access, guard your heart. Be extreme, let people say you are taking Jesus too seriously. You realized your brokenness the day God saved you from your sin, why run back to the lifestyle that doesn’t satisfy? Believers, you are better than what the enemy offers, and you are surely greater than your past. 

Declare this over yourself- I am worth more than a late night fling, I am worth the wait. I will not keep running back to the wo/man that God didn’t place in my life. I am not going to keep dating until I find purpose, my purpose is in Christ and I will wait until He leads me to the right person. 

So the next time you get that text saying they miss you, understand that they need prayer for restoration in Christ, not you. Don’t be a victim of another person’s boredom. 

Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life. (Proverbs 4:23)